I wanted to share with everyone something that I was thinking about last night. I actually sat and gave myself a "MYSELF OVERVIEW"! Weird I know. But I'm a "realist" and I'm also my biggest critic. So I had to ask myself what has this journey done to me?. ( oh and my husband put his little in put in too)!
Have I changed who I am to my family, co-workers, friends? Am I a happier person, inside now? What have I accomplished(besides weight)? Who have I helped? What can I do better?
All these questions just started rolling in...But it made me think long and hard. (lets just say, I normally go to bed at 10p, last night I went at 1am)...
This journey has taught me that I am so much stronger then I thought I was, that I do have the will and the self motivation to push thru those hard times. No I'm not perfect but I'm here and I'm doing it, and I have amazing friends and family around cheering for me. I think about the friends that I've lost along this journey, but most importantly I think about the wonderful ones I've gained!!! and that overshadows all of that. I think about how the Hub can't keep his hands off me!! LOL I had to throw that in!!! Also, the fact that I have way more energy to play outside with my Brandon Boo!
And no losing weight didn't make me want to all of a sudden go out shopping and come home with $5000 dollar worth of clothes, because now I'm smaller and I can fit into more things then before and no I'm not going to take pics of just "me" all day long and post them to the world for attention.
That's not what this is about and that's not what I wanted to blog about either, because that stuff to me doesn't teach anyone anything. Yes, we take pics of our weekend, but I want to show you that I am a human and I do more then workout and go to the gym, because talking about exercise and eating good, starts to get boring. (I'm new to this and I don't want to run you off already)!!! So yes I like to share those times. Funny thing is I've always read peoples weight loss stories and would sit right there knowing I was just like that person and I had the will too it just took me 5 yrs to use it!!!
I've lost 50ish pounds so far and 6 sizes and yes that's huge!!! But I've gained a new person inside. I've always been outgoing with my friends and family. Love to joke and be the life of the party and hey I don't even drink and I'm usually the loudest one there!!!
But there can be times that we don't realize that losing weight and becoming this new person can sometimes changes us and not always for the better, and you may not even notice. And when I started this I never wanted to be a person that people go "boy every since Cynthia changed she thinks her shit don't stink" because that's not me.
It's more about what you can do for others not about just you all the time!
So for me ( and hubby agrees) this has actually brought me out of my shell as a person who isn't afraid to try new things like ( insanity and wanting to run every 5k) that comes to DFW (because before I wouldn't be caught dead running next to other people especially in public, with all my fat jiggling around) or going up and talking to people at the gym, instead of hiding in the back not knowing the moves and not wanting anyone to notice. Instead I want to be in the front waving my hands and sing in spin and stepping to the beat in step class and pumping iron in body pump!!! Being able to do all these things now like run, jump, and sprint, was something I never thought I could do before without dying!!
So see to me it's not about clothes, hair, cussing in every sentence, talking about someone or looking down on others because of who I am now. I started this because I wanted to help others and I hope I've done that so far for those that do read what I post.
I wish each and every person out there the best of luck with whatever it is that you are trying to accomplish with your lives!! I hope not to have upset anyone but like I said Im a "realist" and this was on my heart!!!
Make it a great one!!!!